I am often retained deal with workplace conflict after initial attempts at resolution have been unsuccessful.
Good managers recognize when there is conflict amongst their team and want to pro-actively address it. However, without any training in mediation technique or process, well intentioned efforts to address conflict can backfire.
In my experience, managers often schedule meetings with the employees experiencing conflict, thinking that a meeting will allow those involved to share their perspectives, “shake hands” and move on.
This approach fails to address several factors, such as:
- Everyone likes to be heard. For various reasons, an employee may not be able to fully articulate their perspective in a meeting that includes the person with whom they are in conflict.
- Emotions may take over, potentially derailing the meeting.
- There may be surprises. The manager may learn about issues they had not previously anticipated, including alleged failures of management / leadership.
- What Actually Happened? Even if notes are taken of the meeting, participants, and even the manager, may later disagree on what actually transpired.
I approach mediation in a structured manner which includes:
- Individual meetings with the manager and each participant involved in the conflict to understand, one-on-one, everyone’s perspective and what each person’s goals are moving forward.
- Before a facilitated meeting amongst the participants is even scheduled, systemic barriers to resolution are addressed.
- When a facilitated meeting is scheduled, each participant knows they can safely leave the meeting if they need to do so.
- When resolution is reached, the parties come to agreement on how they will interact in the future. This agreement is put in writing and gives each participant and the manager something concrete to refer back to. The written agreement provides a framework for the ongoing working relationship.
The importance of a written agreement cannot be overstated. The written agreement gives certainty to the parties about how they have agreed to behave and what they can expect from each other. It also gives the manager and employer clear expectations respecting future behaviour and a new starting point from which to manage the workplace relationship.